I know I know, it's been forever since I posted. I actually wrote a couple but didn't post them, they were written a bit hastily perhaps.
So, Thanksgiving is past. I was lucky enough to get invited over to Meagan's Aunt's house for mine, it was really good (homemade strawberry jelly!).
I've decided to pick up on some hobbies I have been neglecting. Writing and drawing. I've had an idea rattling around in my mind about an interesting story idea, I won't spoil it here, you'll just have to wait! Stephen King advises to write what you know, so I'm writing about a 20-something Mormon man finding out who he is. It will be fiction obviously, and I've got an interesting enough premise for myself to start writing it however, I started yesterday. It's pretty interesting to me and it's going much better than my previous attempts. I even came up with an interesting title for now: The Prodigal Son of Perdition. We'll see what happens! The other hobby is my art. So, with these two picking up the slack when I have downtime instead of WoW or other games, I'm feeling pretty good.
I was in a pretty lonely place, feeling pretty worthless a few weeks back. I didn't know what I was supposed to be doing and I didn't want to do what others advised me to do (which caused me to feel even more worthless). However, this lonely state I was in, was self inflicted. I learned the difference between being alone and being lonely, and it was a nice step for me. A good friend of mine told me it's important to be okay with being alone, and it's important to keep yourself busy. So, once I actively decided to do these things and not long for a reprieve, I was strengthened enough to come out of that lonely place I felt inside my heart. We are not meant to be lonely, but sometimes we are meant to be alone and stand on our own accord and make decisions by ourselves, for ourselves. I often tote my desire for independence around like a handbag, conveniently pulling it out when the argument requires it. But I don't think I've ever been as independent as I feel now, and it feels... sturdy I suppose. I'm somewhat of a torrent of feeling at the moment however, and to pinpoint it wouldn't be fair. I think I could write about twenty pages on my feelings at the moment (good and bad), but I will spare you... well I guess this sort of turned into a page or two, so I'll spare you 18 pages.
I made a list of goals for myself a week back and I think I might revise them in a week or two to include more things because I'm knocking them out easily. That feels good.
-A
