My stepdad, Elder Martell, was an eye opening, life changing companionship. He had completely submerged himself within the mission and culture. He had the hard to get items from all across the mission (items that required connections and favors from ZL's and what not). My dad and I bent some of the rules at times (looking back it seems trival at worst), my stepdad taught me how to enjoy the mission by bending a little more... at least while I was with him. We worked a lot less. We still taught, and contacted (which I didn't do much with my dad) some, but my amusement with the companionship allowed me to forgive and go along with the flow. This sometimes got us into slight trouble here and there. And trouble in the mission can be trival, or very serious depending on who found out. If something made it to the Prez... that missionary rarely "went up" (went DL or ZL) till later in his mission. It was just a matter of trust really. In the states, I've been told, ZL's and DL's rise above the challenges and are great examples to other missionaries... in the DR however, DL's and ZL's haven't completely screwed up and have been in the field X amount of months. There was a brief period in which younger missionaries became the leaders by a few months because there were some serious trust issues with the older ones. Prez can't trust you, he isn't letting you be ZL (DL's authority was really laughed at, they held no more sway with the ZL's or the Prez than anyone else). Most of the time ZL's didn't garner any respect either, there were very few that ever did. It was generally because they were 1. very likable 2. lenient, or 3. your friend (in which case both 1 & 2 apply). Hipocracy was rampant and my stepdad taught me all about this strange new system of authority and life... it was strange new game... the game we missionaries played.
Tigeraje (pronounced: Tee-ger-ah-hey) was a new and poinent term for me. For missionaries, it meant disobedience, rebelion, etc. This is how we discribed our "bending" of the rules, and it became much more negligable when you didn't attach the word "disobedience" to what you were doing.
So, you're asking yourself maybe, "How did you do Aaron? You just gave into disobedience so you could get along with your companion? You just set aside your principles?" And I'll respond, no, not completely. I never excused or made denials about what we did, I always declared them to be "wrong" (to my companions annoyance). But understanding the fine art of social interaction is key to teaching with the spirit, which is what it all comes down to. I could be who I was and still be an enjoyable companion. It was my best companionship of the mission really. We laughed a lot, had a lot of interesting experiences, and even found someone to baptize.
It was during this period that I realized the tone of the mission field. The work was painful (not physically) and disappointing. Lack of cultural understanding can kill many missionaries (and did). And when I say "kill", I mean to say kill their drive to teach, and once this is dead, it is very difficult to live again. There were too many distractions, too many easy way outs. I only know of a handful of missionaries (say 5, in the 250 that I knew over the 2 years) that never "died". The best and most obedient missionaries were tested to their limits in some areas of that country. It is for this situation that no experience outside of the mission can ever compare. The difficulty of maintaining faith, not deviating in those ways I've mentioned, and coming out "alive" is extraordinary. We all broke from time to time, whether we admitted it or not. Hopes and spirits are grinded up, crushed and recycled. At least, for those paying attention this is what happened, most people didn't pay attention and missed out on a lot of stuff. The tone of the field was, "Get me to a nice area, let me go ZL so I can get the truck and a phone, and let me leave this place with a family baptism as soon as possible". Most people just wanted to get home. I was one of the few who didn't want to go home, I didn't always want to be where I was, but I never wanted to go home. I really never got homesick, I got mission sick quite often.
However, my life in this area, and with my stepdad was soon at a close after 1 transfer. I was sad to leave, but excited for a new area and companion... And oh boy, did it go down hill from there. That transfer was really the highlight of my mission. I was happy and laughed more then than any other transfer after... it was now time for me to be tested. There would be no more late night Risk games, no more lack of responsibility, no more inside jokes, no more of a lot of things. But oh dear reader, how much more there is...
-A
ps. "Step It Up" is a phrase used and abused by my Stepdad Elder Martell. One of the more important lessons I learned from him: If you want/need something, step it up and get the nice one. You pay for what you get (especially in foreign countries). Don't be a wuss and get the knockoff, step it up and get the nice one with the features. I don't think I ever paid for anything that was "nice" and been disappointed or wished I had "stepped it down". The advise has served me well since.
